Definately NOT a fairy tale
by greentoothbrush
Summary: Dean takes Cas to a bar to finally get him laid after he has fought off the Leviathan in him. Things do not go as planned when they meet a waitress who forces them to some uncomfortable conclusions. DESTIEL. Swearing. Some Cas/OC but ultimately Dean/Cas


"_Do you ever sit and wonder?  
>its so strange how we can be together for so long<br>and never know, never care  
>what goes on in the other ones head<br>Things I've felt but never said  
>You've said things that I've never said<br>So I'll say something I should've said long ago  
>You don't know me, you don't know me at all."<br>_**You don't know me ~ Ben Folds**

~oOo~

"Hey there, can I get two beers please?"

"Draught?"

"Yeah" said the pretty man with a grin.

Dean could hardly stop smiling. His cheeks kind of hurt, and if he wanted to grow a pair of ovaries he would have admitted to the bubbling feeling in the pit of his stomach. And if he really wanted to castrate himself completely he would say it was due to the Angel sat in the corner booth in this shitty little Irish bar. Cas had actually done it, fought off the leviathan inside of him. Just generally been his kick ass self which never ceased to amaze Dean who had always classed him as his nerdy little dude, but hey, who was complaining? Cas was back, they figured out the Leviathans had a weakness now all that remained was to hunt those sons of bitches down. And that was what Dean did best. Life was good, so he brought Cas to a bar to celebrate. Maybe get him laid. Hopefully. Dean didn't have a lot of faith in Cas' wooing powers after the 'Den of Iniquity' incident.

Then something caught his eye, always a hunter's eye.

"Is that a pentagram?" he asked, trying to keep his voice neutral.

"Um, yeah?" the barmaid replied uncertainly, covering up the tattoo on the inside of her wrist by tucking her light brown hair behind her ear,

"Do you know what that means?" he asked.

"No, idiot, I got a symbol inked permanently onto my skin without reading up on it." Her words were harsh but her voice was a soft Irish brogue, her eyes were kind and the smile on her lips told him she meant no harm.

"Let me guess you were a devil worshipper, trying to scare mom and dad, listening to Iron Maiden and smoking weed?" he asked with a cheeky grin.

She surprised him with throwing her head back and letting loose a laugh that sounded like it came from her toes.

"I don't think you could be more wrong. I was always more of a Cinderella kind of girl" She started cleaning glasses.

"D'you wanna set me straight?" he leaned over, really putting on the Winchester charm.

"Not really, no." she gave him a cheeky grin in return, he realised she was enjoying the flirting but not taking him seriously.

"Okay, Cinderella, Give me another go?"

She stood back arms folded, "Open fire."

"Um, you actually do know that the pentagram means protection?" she smiled and nodded at him. "What do you need protection from can I ask?"

"It doesn't just mean protection, you know, it means a lot more. About mother nature and life and stuff . . ." she finishes flushing red.

"Oh"

"Yeah that's the reaction most people give," she smiled ruefully. "Why don't you go back to your friend?" she gestured to Cas. "He looks like a little lost puppy."

"He always looks like that." He gets a laugh from her and an idea starts to blossom in his head. "Looks like you're having a slow night, how bout I bring him over here?"

"Grand."

"What?"

"Um, yeah, fine." She waves a hand at Cas and goes to serve the only other patron in the bar.

Dean gestures at Cas to come over. He does with his usual strut and then just stands there.

"Cas, take a seat, relax. Here," he slides the beer over to him, "have a beer."

"Why did we move Dean," Cas' voice grates out.

"Because I think you deserve to get laid," Cas' eyes widen "look just chill out and act human, okay? Just - just be cool Cas."

"Dean I don't think-"

"Oh so Deans the name?" the Barmaid smiles, Cas notices she has a kind smile.

"Yeah, and this is Cas, the lost puppy. I never got your name?"

"Grainne."

"Sorry what?"

"It means Grace in Gaelic" Cas answered before Grainne could.

"Yeah how did you?" she looks thoroughly confused.

"Cas is a bit of a nerd," Dean throws him a look that clearly means _dude I said act cool_. "Grace, huh?" He smirks at Cas. "So you're Irish?"

"I sure am, and you two?" she returns absent minded cleaning glasses.

"All over, we were army brats." He sips quietly.

"You always let him talk for you?" Grainne smiles at Cas.

"No, just around people. I've been told I am socially inept," Cas rumbles.

Dean blushes bright red and feels he should apologise to Cas, but Grainne laughs "I've been told that too, don't let the haters get you down."

Dean **knows** Cas won't get that reference so he interrupts quickly, "So why are you in America?"

"Ah you know, land of opportunity, the American Dream, fairy tale ending - all that shite." She smiled self-deprecatingly, but there was a hint of bitterness in her eyes.

"I wouldn't peg you for a white picket fence," he grins at her.

"Oh trust me I'm not . . . just some . . . acceptance."

"How's that going for you?" Dean asks as he finishes his first beer.

"I'm a barmaid, how do you think?" she laughs throwing off the heavy atmosphere.

"It's a noble profession." He smirks.

"I'm glad I get your approval Dean," she turns to Cas who seems forgotten in the conversation. "What about you, do you approve?"

"No." Dean closes his eyes and very nearly face palms. Typical fucking Cas.

"Why?" her tone is questioning, and strangely unoffended.

Cas tilts his head, "You are not happy here. You are capable of so much more, but you are afraid to act on your thirst to make a difference."

"Who _are _you?" she questions defensively.

"I am Castiel. I am-" And Dean knows what is coming next.

"HE'S A . . . Professor. Of . . . Theology," Dean grins too wide and claps Cas on the back. "Like I said big old nerd is our Cas."

Grainne seems shaken by Cas but is trying to shake it off. "And you Dean, what do you do?"

"I'm a mechanic." His usual cover story, he knows she'll buy it, he looks like a mechanic, he can walk the walk, and talk the talk. He takes a sip of his second cheap beer.

"So how long have you two been together?" Dean chokes on the beer and turns bright red.

"We're not together. Like together-together. We're just friends. We're not gay." Dean has never felt warmer, his whole body is hot with embarrassment and his cheeks are vibrant red. His eyes flicker to Cas who sits there – completely unaware and unbothered by the insinuation.

"Oh, right, sorry. Didn't mean to, um, put my foot in anything." She looks flushed and kind of embarrassed herself.

"Dean is afraid of insinuations of him being homosexual as he believes that it would impinge on his masculinity." Dean is pretty sure that this conversation is going to give him heart failure.

"Well Cas, you tell it like it is don't ya?" she flashed him a cheeky grin. "So what about you? Why isn't your masculinity threatened?"

"I am indifferent to gender." Cas replies before Dean can get them off the touchy subject, but with that reply he sits back shocked.

"Well, we're in the same boat there then." She smiles again. It suddenly occurs to Cas that she smiles a lot, and he likes her smiles. Dean is just in shock that he is in the company of two bisexuals. He never went to college, this is a new experience as far as he knows.

"Is that a promise ring or and engagement ring?" Cas asks, he does that (Dean will not call it adorable) head tilt. Dean is thunderstruck by the thought that Cas is actually making conversation.

"Both it was an engagement ring, and now it's a promise I'll never forget the person who gave it to me." She says trapped by Cas' gaze. Her brown eyes are wide and Dean thinks he knows how she feels, Caught in those beautiful blue headlights.

"What happened?" Dean asked.

"She died in a car accident." Grainne gave them a sad little smile. "It's a while ago now . . . seven years."

"My brother's girlfriend died about that long ago. You never really get over it." Dean sighed, trying to be cool about the fact that Grainne had said **She.**

"What about you two? Longest relationship?" she grinned with sad eyes obviously trying to change the morose atmosphere.

"I don't really do relationships," Dean said awkwardly then looked at Cas, wondering how on earth he was going to get around this one.

"I am a virgin." Dean hates that he loves that Cas is human enough to blush.

"Is that like a choice? Yano, like, religion?" She asks.

"No," Cas says vehemently then he deflates. "I think it is due to my lack of social skills."

"Nope, not possible." She shakes her head and the two patrons look up shocked. "Nobody who looks like you, regardless of social skills, is a virgin by anything other than choice."

Dean looks at Cas then, properly looks at him, past the trench coat and those baby blues that swallow him up without him even realising it. He has the messy bed-head, high cheek bones, his eyes are framed by thick full charcoal eyelashes, his lips are wide and chapped but still extremely appealing, full and pouty, but he isn't feminine, not in the slightest, he has a strong jaw and that permanent 5 o clock stubble. Dean realises he is stunning. In a totally not gay way, Dean wishes he could wipe that thought from his head. With some bleach.

"You could be in love with someone without realising it, Cas." She shrugged "I did it for years, pushed everyone away without realising it, because I couldn't admit I was gay and totally in love with another woman. I thought it was just friendship but I was wrong."

Dean doesn't know why he feels so uncomfortable. He squirms in his seat. Then he decides to man up and grow a pair. And forget where he's been trying to steer this conversation to for the past ages, and just out and say it.

"Anyway, the point is, Cas has had a bad time of it recently and he has decided he doesn't want to die a virgin." Cas goes bright red, his bambi eyes widen even further, he remembers Chastity at the Den of iniquity and begins to chug his beer. "So I'm trying to find a suitable woman, any suggestions?" he smirked, his tone full of suggestion.

"Um, a brothel?" she raises an eyebrow at the cheek of his insinuation.

"We tried that. Cas needs a steadier hand than some of the professional ladies. So-" Dean tries not to laugh at Cas chugging like there's no tomorrow.

"-MAY I have another one?" A wild looking Cas asks her cutting off Dean in a way he hadn't all night.

"Sure," she walks away to fill him a pint with a grin on her face. Cas' face was adorable when Dean had begun propositioning her on his behalf.

"Dean, what are you doing?" Cas whispered furiously.

"You almost died I'm just trying to-" he whispered back.

"EXACTLY! I almost died so I wanted to celebrate the fact that I'm not, with you but you feel the need to embarrass me in front-"

"I never meant to embarrass you, how do you know she will say-"

"How could she possibly say yes? She knows nothing about me-"

"People do this all the time Cas-"

"But I don't Dean!"

"Exactly, maybe you should-"

"I am not good with people Dean, she will not say-"

"Yes." Grainne says as she puts the pint down in front of Cas.

"What?" Cas gasps.

"What?" Dean echoes. He never thought it would actually _work._ . .

"I finish in fifteen." She left them thunderstruck to go and serve a group of construction workers, clearly just off a shift.

"Did that just happen?" Dean asked Cas, his eyes glued on the admittedly fine ass that was walking away from them.

"She just consented to have sex with me." Cas sounded, typical Cas, confused.

"um," Dean swallowed around the weird feeling in his throat. "Okay, yeah, I take it you don't have condoms?"

Cas looked like he had just realised the world was coming to an end. Dean realised he might have to take this in baby steps "They're, um, a form of contraception that-"

"I know what condoms are Dean. I have been alive for millennia. Even if I haven't had occasion to use them" Cas snaps at him, which is a sign he is very stressed.

"Okay well" Dean feels unbelievably weird handing Cas one of the condoms in his wallet. He is handing _an angel_ a condom. He's handing _**Cas**_ a condom.

Cas looks at the little foil wrapper contemplatively. "Are you sure this is a good idea Dean?" Cas looks at him with those huge eyes, doing that **not adorable** head tilt.

"Of course," Dean's voice comes out a bit higher than intended, he clears it and tries again. "You'll love it." His eyes stay connected to Cas though in a way he can't help, in a way he now knows Sammy calls eye sex.

"Okay."

~oOo~

"So Cas, you coming?" Grainne asked pulling a leather jacket over her shoulders.

" . . . Yes." He replied after a look at Dean.

"Cool, see ya Dean!" She waved at him.

Dean watched the trench coat follow her out the door with a sick feeling in his stomach. Something he ate must not have agreed with him, he had this awful twisting feeling in his gut.

"Can I get a whiskey please?"

~oOo~

Grainne threw her keys on the kitchen table and shrugged the leather jacket off her shoulders. Cas noted that her small apartment was empty, completely devoid of any personal touches. There were the basic forms of furniture, kitchen table, chairs; he spotted a double bed with plain white sheets on it. It reminded him of the Winchesters motel rooms, functional but not a home.

"Come on Cas," she looked over her shoulder as she went into her bedroom. He followed feeling extremely nervous.

"Go on, take a seat," he took a seat on the bed while she hung up her jacket. Cas couldn't understand why his heart was beating so fast, why his cheeks were so flushed. Grainne took a seat beside him.

"You look nervous.

"I have not done this before." He said quietly.

She places a hand on his cheek, "you're going to be fine." Then she leans in and brushes her lips against his. He remains stock still. She presses her lips to his again and again, Castiel remains still, unsure as to what to do. She takes one of his lips between her own and pulls down, still no reaction.

"Cas, this is a two way street." She sighs.

"I told you – I don't understand," he sounds so lost.

"Okay," she sighs, then turns on the bed and straddles him, her thighs either side of his. "Close your eyes," he does. "Okay, imagine I'm Dean." His eyes fly open.

"What? I don-"

"shush, shh. Trust me." Her brown eyes are very close to his and he can see nothing harmful in them so he does. "Close your eyes again. Good." She takes one hand and places it on her hip, "Imagine I'm Dean. This is Dean's body." She places her hand on one cheek and slides the other into his hair. "Dean's hands," she whispers. Cas' breath begins to quicken, she pulls one of his lips between hers then lets it snap back. "Dean's lips." Something in Cas snaps.

Suddenly he's everywhere, his tongue plunging into her mouth forcefully, his hands roaming her back, pulling her hips closer to him. She moans, he is kissing her so hard, and so hot her hands are in his hair as she sucks on his tongue. It's easy to get carried away, but she remembers that this isn't for her. And this isn't the reason she brought him home. She pulls away with an obscene noise, he tries to follow her.

"Cas, CAS!" she pushed back his shoulders and he opens his eyes. He seems shocked. she pulls back a bit unable to help herself noticing how deliciously hard he is, it has been a long, long time. "I brought you home to show you this. You're in love with him."

Cas opens his mouth, but words don't come out.

"Exactly," she sighs. "He's in love with you too Cas. He's just in denial and I don't think you were even aware." She grins "So I decided to match make."

"I don't know what to do." He lowers his eyes from hers.

"You go over there and kiss him like you just kissed me. No way in hell he'll reject you." She gets off his lap and allows him to stand up.

"Okay, thank you for your help," Cas makes to walk out.

"Whoa cowboy, you're not just walking away into the sunset! I want to see the big romantic kiss and fairy tale ending." He looks at her blankly, "You're bringing me with you."

"I don't think-"

"Not taking no for an answer."

"Fine," he mutters with fire in his eyes.

"Are we taking my car, where-" he lifts two fingers to her forehead.

~oOo~

Sam finally got out of bed to let his drunken ass brother into the room they shared. He was obviously not in the best of shape; he'd been trying to get the key in the lock for fifteen minutes now.

"Dean what're you-"

"Sammay!" Dean is leaning against the doorframe.

"What the hell happened to you? Did you try and keep up with Cas? Where is Cas?"

"Whoa Sammay! Sh'just chill. That's what Cas s'doin. Cas sss getting laiiid!" he stumbles into the room. "So I got hammred."

"Jesus Christ," Sam pulled a hand through his hair.

"WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED?" he heard a screech behind him.

"CAS!" Dean shouted with a huge smile.

"You said we should go to Dean?" Cas said to the woman Sam didn't recognise. Light brown hair, big brown eyes.

"What the – how did we get here? What is going on? What _**are**_ you?" her eyes were huge as she took a step from Cas.

"I was an angel of the Lord. But then -"

"It's kind of a long story Cas, for another day?" Sam asked pointedly glaring at Cas.

"I do not understand." Cas replies

"Well that makes two of us," the woman looked scared as she turned to Sam. "Who are you?"

"I'm Sam, a friend-"

"Dean's brother." She finishes nodding.

"Um, yeah." He scratches the back of his head, her pretty eyes suddenly makes him very conscious of the fact that he has just got out of bed, and is only wearing sweatpants. She seems to notice the fact herself, her eyes widen as they take in his body.

"Um, ahem, cool tattoo." She says her voice sounding weird to her own ears.

He smiles; he had such a cute smile. "Thanks-"

"Grainne?" Cas calls.

"What?"

"I don't know what to do. . . " he is stood beside Dean who is passed out sprawled over an armchair.

"Jesus Christ, this was supposed to be a big fairy tale ending. men can't do anything right! Can't you . . . I don't know magic him sober?" she asks her eyebrows pulled together.

Cas doesn't answer he only places two fingers to Dean's forehead. Then Dean wakes up, "whut?" he jumps out of his seat.

"What's going-" he doesn't get chance to finish because Cas is has a hand on each cheek and is kissing the life out of him.

"Atta boy Cas." Grainne grins.

Cas pulls away from him, and looks to her "Was that okay?"

"I'm not the one you should be asking you ejit!" she laughs.

"He doesn't taste as nice as you. He tastes like whiskey and beer." Cas' nose wrinkles.

"What is going on?" both Winchester brothers ask at the same time.

"Cas is in love with you, and you're in love with him." She says plainly.

"Well, obviously." Sam declares.

"Wait, obviously what?" Dean scrambles away from them.

"Dean-" Sam begins.

"Why did you get completely bladdered when you thought Cas was going to have sex with me?"

"I didn't-"

"And what did you feel like when Cas kissed you?"

"I-"

"And-"

"IM NOT GAY!" he bellows.

"Good, cos Cas is an angel – he isn't male or female. Man up and admit you're in love with him." Sam pipes up.

"You don't-"

"Dean," Cas who has been silent until now, begins softly. "I understand if you do not feel similarly. Perhaps Grainne was mistaken when she said you felt the same way. I am sorry." He turns to leave.

"Cas, no!" Dean looks so confused and torn. Cas stops and waits for him. "Arrgh!" he pulls Cas in by the back of his head and kisses him.

"Aww." Grainne sighs. "Took them long enough."

"You have no idea." Sam says.

Cas begins to moan into the kiss and Dean shuffles them towards the bed.

"I think that's our cue to leave."

"Definitely," Sam agrees, grabbing a shirt off the floor, a coat off the chair and exiting quickly.

On the outside of the door they look at each other.

"So . . ." Sam feels terminally awkward.

"Now you have to explain to me what the hell Cas is." She demands, hands on hips.

"Okay," he scratches the back of his head. "Um, over coffee?"

"That sounds great" she grins shyly.

~oOo~

"Thanks," Grainne says wrapping her hands around her cup of tea.

"Um yeah, so Cas is an angel. He pulled Dean out of hell-"

"Wait, what was Dean doing in hell?"

"He sold his soul to bring me back from the dead." Sam sighed

"So, you've been dead?"

"Uh, a couple of times actually," he smiles ruefully. "It's kind of a long story"

"I love stories." Sam looks at her, the pentagram on her wrist, the silver locket around her neck, her full mouth chewing on some salty french-fries and her big soft brown eyes.

"It all started on my six month birthday. . ."

~oOo~

Okay so 1. It's pronounced "Graawnya"  
>2. This is my first Destiel fic so . . . be gentle?<br>3. I quite like her, I'm considering a spin off with her and Sam. If you'd be interested just alert this story and if i get round to it Ill add a chapter here.

And Please Review? xx


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